How to talk to parents now?
The case related to the way of raising children of Xuan Bac’s wife is receiving a lot of attention from netizens. Specifically, after discovering that the 7th grade son’s phone was sensitive, she posted on her personal page a warning, broke the phone, and shared 18+ private photos in her son’s nick.
Ignoring the conflicting controversies about Xuan Bac’s wife’s harsh parenting style, the story of students watching sex and 18+ things has always been a topic of endless controversy, especially in middle school.
Many children when watching feel ashamed, guilty, hiding… to avoid the eyes of their parents and adults. This is simply the act of “discovering” the “want to know” things of adolescence, but the attitude adults face sometimes makes children feel like “a criminal”.
What do middle school students think about friends watching sex movies, sensitive photos?
When talking with the character, many students frankly admitted that they had seen 18+ publications, some even secretly watched sex movies when they were in elementary school. The reasons are many, from being invited by friends, surfing social networks and then accidentally seeing them, or actively watching hot movies just to… easy to talk to you.
Friend Minh Nam (A 8th grader, Hung Yen province) confided that not only often secretly watched his parents sex movies, but he also talked about this issue with many male friends in class: “The first time I watched sex movies, nude photos was when I was in 5th grade. I watched it because my friends invited me to watch it when I was bored. Since then, I often watch these things more.”
I think it’s normal for Xuan Bac’s children to see pictures 18+, because friends around me are all over the world. When going to school, girls are few, but some boys often talk about this. Then we invited each other to watch it, mostly out of curiosity, but we don’t judge anyone.”
Em Lan Anh (9th graders, Hanoi) said that sensitive photos or sex films have also appeared in stories with girls’ friends.
“Normally, I also see many classmates talking about this issue, I just said a few sentences without any bad intentions. But actually I know, my male classmates also have a private chat group, in which they talk about girls and 18+ things too.”
She also recounted her first experience when watching 18+ movies: “The first time I was curious to see “that movie” was because I saw that you guys talked about this topic too much. Like in class, you guys talked about some terms that I didn’t understand, I wanted to watch the movie to see my friends. say what.
Then from the sex movie, I know some more groups on Facebook, see the pictures too. Actually, I just found out, I didn’t dare to watch much because I was afraid of affecting my studies.”
I admit I never actively search for keywords 18+, but I Phuong Nhung (a 9th grader in Lai Chau province) shares that she often encounters sensitive, “hot-eyed” images on social networks.
According to Phuong Nhung, today’s middle school students watching sex movies is not a rare problem, even many of them used to do “sex” when they were still in school.
“I think it’s normal for you to watch hot movies or whatever. Now many of you watch 18+ things and that, some of you are still ‘addicted’, now social networks are also developing a lot. I heard from you that some other friends also had sex from a very early age, but their parents didn’t know at all.”
Students have many “why questions” about gender but it is difficult to tell their parents…
At puberty, most of the girls and boys are curious about sex and want to learn about “this and that”. However, many children admit that it is not easy to discuss with their parents about 18+ questions.
That’s my story too Minh Nam when asked by a reporter if he dared to confide in his parents about sex education. The friend immediately denied and added: “I’m very shy about talking about this matter with my parents. I don’t want my parents to know that I’m watching a sensitive movie and will also try to hide it carefully. If I talk directly, I’m afraid my parents will beat me up.
Parents said it was forbidden to watch adult movies, and it was forbidden to fall in love early. My parents told me that if I’m not old enough, don’t watch it. If I’m curious about “sex”, I’ll just go online to watch videos and clips to better understand the issue.”
Minh Nam also recounted the awkward experience of watching sex movies and being discovered by his parents in 7th grade. After that, his parents’ scolding made him even more embarrassed, embarrassed, and had difficulty wanting to want to. Talk to your family again.
“EI was discovered by my parents when I was in my own room, forgot to lock the door. My father opened the door to come in, just as I was watching a movie, completely undressed. After seeing that, my parents were quite angry. There is a lot of scolding, and a lot of advice. I’m very shy, since then I also limit watching the movie “pig” somewhat. It took almost 2 months for me to be able to talk naturally with my parents, because every time I opened my mouth, I was afraid that my parents would remind me of the case I watched 18+.”
Sharing this opinion with Minh Nam is a friend Lan Anh. Her friend said: “It’s not just me who doesn’t want to confide in my parents, many of my classmates do too. My parents are also quite psychological and love me, but I don’t know where to start the story.
I think if you find something difficult to understand, you can ask your friends or search online yourself. My parents also insinuated that we are young, so we should study a lot, not be too depraved in love or learn about 18+ things.“
And in my opinion Thao Van (9th grade student, Lai Chau province) although her friend really wanted her parents to answer her teenage questions, it was her indifference, considering sex lessons as a small story that made it difficult for her to open up to her parents. more parents.
The female student said: “My parents are not like many other families, when I asked about this issue, they did not care and did not answer. As for important and sensitive topics, my parents will be angry and scold me. If possible, I hope parents will understand the position of their children better.”
Let’s look at the act of looking at 18+ pictures of children from the perspective of teenagers
In fact, watching sex in middle school is not as serious as parents. Most importantly, parents should be able to answer 3 questions:
– Where do you see pictures 18+?
– Why are you looking at 18+ pictures?
– And lastly: Are parents willing to listen to their children share their questions and experiences in sex education with their children?
According to Dr. Vu Thu Huong (lecturer of Primary Education Department, Hanoi National University of Education): VIt’s completely normal for middle school kids to start watching sex and movies 18+… it’s completely normal. This can’t be 100% banned, so the only way is for parents to educate their children about sex as early as possible.
She confided her own family story: “I once found out that my middle school girl has a boyfriend. My attitude at that time was also acceptable, not forbidden, but clearly explained: The two of you are not allowed to have sex, go over the limit with each other. I never say that my children can’t be loved, instead, I say frankly that the law prohibits children from having sex before their age. If the children go over the limit, the law will handle it, but I can’t save it.”
Dr. Thu Huong said that parents’ harshening of their children’s sensitive matters on social networks will create a very bad premise: The children will find ways to avoid and not communicate with their parents. Only then did things get really complicated.“Usually, parents are the last to know about their children because the children want to hide. If the parents themselves are too harsh, I am sure the next time, the children will hide more sensitive things.”
Meanwhile, Education Specialist, Director of Thanh Cong Academy – Dr. Vu Viet Anh said: It is a very common instinct for children to be curious about sensitive images when they come of age.
The main problem is that parents, as drivers, should pay attention to and care for their children and orient their children’s sex education. We need to know that this is an opportunity for parents and children to talk openly about gender issues, as well as an opportunity for sex education to help children not fall into abusive situations. sexual side”.
He believes that parents must also set an example for their children to follow. “Parents also have to accept to install some blocking software so that their children are not allowed to access 18+ websites. Those are very clear rules. If you do not agree, you have the right not to use it.”.
(Student’s name has been changed in the post)
at Blogtuan.info – Source: Kenh14.Vn – Read the original article here
