Tears, laughter inside the ‘one breast family’ in Ho Chi Minh City

The patients eat lunch at the “one-breed house” after returning from the hospital.

Sad and happy “one-breed house”

At 11am, the rickety motel next to the Hanoi Highway (Linh Trung Ward, Thu Duc City, Ho Chi Minh City) was as hot as a boiler. A few minutes later, the house was filled with female patients returning from the process of entering the 2nd facility of the Ho Chi Minh City Oncology Hospital for cancer examination, chemotherapy and radiation treatment.

With a red face, swollen eyelids as if she had just cried, Mrs. Nguyen Thi Saw (SN 1956, hometown of Tien Giang province) tried to lift her trembling arm to receive a glass of lemonade from the bald woman with her chest and head. criss-crossed with huge scars.

Her name is Nguyen Thi Phuong (56 years old), who rented the house above as a shelter for poor fellow sick people.

“I just got back from radiation treatment, so I’m still very tired. We have just massaged, squeezed lemon juice for her to quickly regain her strength. Everyone here is like that, healthy people take care of the weaker ones like sisters in the family, “Ms. Phuong said.

She felt tired and lethargic after radiation therapy at the hospital. Returning to the nursing home, she was taken care of by fellow patients here.

For more than half a year now, this hostel is no different from the second family of more than 20 unfortunate women with breast cancer. This “big family” was formed from the last efforts of Mrs. Phuong, who is in the final stages of a serious illness.

Ms. Phuong discovered she had breast cancer at the end of 2019. Without a husband and children, when she was ill, she lived in the corridor of the Ho Chi Minh City Cancer Hospital. Here, she met patients with similar circumstances. Among them is Ms. Vo Thi My Duyen (50 years old, living in Binh Tan district, HCMC).

Loving the orphan Phuong, Mrs. Duyen volunteered to take care of her for free. Just like that, Mrs. Phuong, Mrs. Duyen and their co-morbidities together clung to the hospital corridor to wait for the day of medicine.

In the middle of May 2021, when the Covid-19 epidemic broke out, the hospital asked patients not to continue to live in the corridor. Mrs. Duyen, Mrs. Phuong and the rest were forced to go out and find temporary accommodation.

The long treatment process caused Phuong to lose all her hair. Loving her fellow sick people, she rented an inn for them to live in and called it a house of one breast.

The cost of renting is high, they can’t stand it. Loving the people who were poor and still carrying diseases, Mrs. Phuong decided to sell the house. After dividing it all among her brothers, she spent a portion of it for treatment. The rest, she used to rent a small house as a place to stay and rest for fellow sick people.

Mrs. Duyen shared: “The sisters here, all have the same disease and all have surgery to remove one breast, so it’s fun to call it a house of one breast. Sisters go to the same hospital for medical examination and treatment, then meet and introduce each other to this inn. Now, we all work together to pay the rent.”

“We came from four lands to live together, but we consider each other as one family. Sisters in the same situation, suffering from the same cancer, should understand and love each other very much. Living together, sisters can share sorrows and joys, difficulties with each other and fight diseases together”, she added.

“Never sad and never afraid to die”

On the day she returned to live with everyone at the “one-breed’s house”, Ms. Huynh Thi Le (65 years old) was so happy that she burst into tears. She has been ill since 2018.

The money from selling lottery tickets in front of the hospital is only temporary enough for her to take her medicine every month. Unable to pay rent for the days she stayed in Ho Chi Minh City for chemotherapy and radiotherapy, she had to live in the hospital corridor.

Ms. Duyen (blue shirt) calculates, “one breast” has become the second family of more than 20 breast cancer patients from all regions to HCMC for treatment.

“During the day, I sold lottery tickets, at night I asked to sleep in the hospital corridor. My health is weak, I have cancer again, I am very weak, I keep fainting on hot days. Fortunately, Miss Phuong loved me and let me live with her. It’s a lot of fun here, sisters have each other so there’s nothing to be afraid of. We are not afraid of sadness and we are not afraid of death anymore,” said Ms. Le emotionally.

Before coming to the house of a single breast, many cancer patients are very pessimistic, easily falling into despair when they know that they will soon say goodbye to the temporary world. There are people suffering, depressed, desperate to ask for suicide.

At that time, the old members of the one-woman family gathered together to advise and comfort. People try to convey negative thoughts, optimistic outlook on life to make them feel confident, reduce despair.

Ms. Nhi partly alleviated her homesickness and missed her children when she was shared and comforted by many co-infected people when she moved to live in a nursing home.

People tell themselves that sadness and despair do nothing but make the disease worse. Instead, they spread the message to live the rest of the days optimistically, beautifully.

“Then sisters take care of each other. Those who come first take care of those who come later. Only in the same situation can we understand each other, so we take care of each other from mental health to physical health. We cook for each other to eat to ensure nutrition, listen, share joys and sorrows with each other,” Duyen said.

Nearly a year ago, thanks to a nanny’s home, Ms. Mai Thi Nhi (36 years old, from Phu Yen province) alleviated her nostalgia for her children and homesickness when she had to leave her hometown to go to Ho Chi Minh City to treat her illness alone. Suffering from a serious illness at a very young age, Ms. Nhi daily struggled with her own sorrows.

Living together, Ms. Le and her co-morbidities are not afraid of sadness and death, even though they have a serious illness.

But since coming home to “one breast”, the nostalgia for her 3-year-old child has been shared and comforted by her co-morbidities. She also found the joy of living when she took on the task of “making a motorbike taxi” to drive Mrs. Duyen to the market every day to cook for the whole family.

Now, the only sadness of a single breast family is to see its members quietly leave. Ms. Duyen confided: “Last year, we broke up with a few people. At that scene, everyone cried. But no one cries out of fear of death, but cries out of pity for the departed.

“We stay together, fight together, fight diseases, so we love each other. Even though we know that everyone has to leave eventually, watching that scene was like losing a loved one. It’s so sad, so the tears just keep falling,” she added.

Articles, photos:Ha Nguyen