Vietnamese woman tells story of past sexual abuse
Called a stain of the past, no one really wants to talk about it, just wish there was a deepest hole on Earth, throw it into it and bury it with thousands of thousands of layers of dry gravel. Or, throw it straight into the air and let it fly into the faraway universe and never come back.
That can be the feeling of many people when they have to endure something so terrible in the past. People choose to shake it off, throw it aside and move on. But besides that, there are still people who are willing to keep that past, bravely speaking out, not only for themselves but for the better good, for the community, for society.
That’s exactly what I want to say about a Vietnamese woman named Isabelle Müller. The person who did not accept to bury the past but bravely spoke up, writing words that were not peaceful but had a strong impact so that those who fell into her situation would have the courage to crush the evil, such!
Haunting memories of an 8-year-old girl
On March 19, Vietnamese-German woman Isabelle Müller launched a book called “Daughter of the Phoenix” in Ho Chi Minh City. This book has been translated into Vietnamese and officially released in Vietnam 13 years after the German version was released and caused a stir.
Isabelle Müller was born on May 25, 1964 in Tours (France), the youngest child in a family of 5 children. Her mother is Vietnamese and her father is French, growing up in poor, squalid conditions in a small village in France. Her father is a former French soldier who fought in Vietnam, and her mother is a Vietnamese woman of North Vietnamese origin. She ran away from home at the age of 12 because she did not want to bury her life in a marriage that was set by her parents. She went through many hardships before marrying a French soldier and settling in her husband’s hometown.
Having an Asian mother, Isabelle not only grew up in poverty and poverty, but also suffered from the stigma and hatred of people around her because of her deeply ingrained racial ideology. into the blood of the people there. Fate seemed too cruel to that girl when at the age of 8, she was sexually abused by her own father.
Just because of the curiosity of a young girl who had just had the first vibrations of her life, Isabelle was “brought into life” really by the person who gave birth to her. Innocently asking her father about the “adult” kiss, the 8-year-old girl that year accidentally became the prey of her biological father. After being harassed in the bathroom for the first time, over the years, Isabelle was abused in different ways.
Isabelle writes in her book: “My father was standing by the sink. His eyes had a strange glint I’d never noticed before, and there was something like a smile on his lips.
“Because you care about such things,” he said, “you must also know what a man’s stuff looks like.”
Before I could say anything, Dad unlocked his pants…”
It was the first in a series of extremely haunting days for an 8-year-old girl who did not know what to do. The words and words that Isabelle used to tell about her father’s abuse in her childhood, although sometimes they did not fully describe the extreme obsession of that year, they partly recreated the terrible and real images. making the reader feel suffocated.
“Dad ordered me to get down on my knees to try ‘something new.’ There will be a different approach this time. “What you did just now,” he said, “an ordinary man is not allowed to do. “.
It must be so, I sighed in my mind. But why should I kneel?
I felt like blood was running out of my veins when I saw my dad unzipping his pants again…”
Experiencing such pain both physically and mentally alone, but Isabelle never once dared to open her mouth to confide in her mother and siblings because the fear of losing her family is more terrible than that silently. suffer. She thought so, so she didn’t say.
“My mother will never forgive anyone who persecutes her child. The torment for a long time makes me silent, suffer, suffocate.” Isabelle said.
In fact, Isabelle has repeatedly “implicitly” signaled her pain with pictures, allusions… but all were ignored by adults. I don’t know if it’s because the worry of food and money blurs the sensitivity in their eyes or because of the default thought that children don’t know such “nonsense” things.
Struggling in the tragedy that no one knows to share, Isabelle has repeatedly thought of death to free herself. Once, she rushed to the intersection like a moth, but fortunately the car driver braked in time.
Magical revival
Self-sacrificing a few times but still staying with life, Isabelle began to forget the thought of suicide, but the childhood obsession still stuck with her for many years.
She could not feel sublimated every time she was close to her boyfriend. She had to see a psychologist and of course the answer was because of obsessions from the past. Thinking that Isabelle’s life would fade away with indelible pain, a man appeared and pulled her out of the mire. It was the guy Stephan, who is now her husband.
Isabelle opened up to Stephan about her memories after a long time of knowing. And then, what she received was not rejection, but love, understanding, and sharing to help her heal.
Throughout her life, in her journey to escape the bitterness of the past, Isabelle has always relied on her mother as a fulcrum. Every time she was desperate, she thought of her mother and gradually calmed down.
The woman with Vietnamese blood running through her veins, who did not allow herself to be overwhelmed by misfortune, rose to take control of her life and finally – despite all the constraints of fate – and has now become a woman. become a successful businessman in Germany.
Isabelle dedicates the last page of her book to her mother: “Today, I know I wouldn’t have survived without my mother’s example. I’ve learned from her to find hope in moments of deep despair, seeing obstacles as challenges to overcome. overcome. Her strong faith, Vietnamese blood and energy are my salvation. Her example has helped me overcome all difficulties. I will always feel her love.”
Isabelle Müller and her Vietnamese mother gave birth to her.
The story of Isabelle Müller is not only about finding happiness but also about the path to find it. It is turning unhappiness into happiness. It is learning how to turn a negative spiral into a positive spiral. All experiences form the author’s philosophy of life. That philosophy is the essence of a happy life.
Although she “definitely experienced bad things, including sexual abuse, psychological terror, burnout, exclusion, discrimination, poverty, betrayal”, in return, she Always say to yourself: “I have also experienced true love, warmth, affection, encouragement, willingness to help, empathy, friendship, luck and happiness. And I am allowed to live healthy here on earth. earth and enjoy this life”.
Even though she had gone through the worst years of her life, being sexually abused by her own loved ones, suffering, being mute, unable to speak to anyone, living in despair for many years… but she did not Surrender to adversity, strive to rise above and inspire people.
Through her writings, Isabelle also encourages victims of sexual violence to break their silence to break the perpetrator’s power. Over the course of three and a half years, Isabelle Müller has spoken 150 times in the eight federal states to audiences, has been a guest on television and radio, and been invited to the headquarters of the President of the Federal Republic of Germany for her commitment.
A child’s heart always aches for his homeland, his roots
With her mother, Mrs. Dau Thi Cuc (aka Loan), Isabelle Müller made trips to Southeast Asia in the 1990s to learn about her Vietnamese roots.
In May 2016, the author established the LOAN Stiftung Charity Foundation, which specializes in implementing educational projects for ethnic minority children in the poorest mountainous areas of Northern Vietnam.
In nearly 6 years of operation, Loan Stiftung has carried out a total of 35 projects, of which 29 projects have been completed and handed over. Contribution amount up to 1 million Euro from sponsors. Besides supporting poor provinces in the North of Vietnam such as Cao Bang, Ha Giang, Lao Cai, Yen Bai, Loan Stiftung also implemented a project to help children in difficulty during the historic flood in October 2020 in Ha Tinh. – the hometown of Mrs. Dau Thi Cuc.
Isabelle Müller has done a lot to help upland children through the LOAN fund and she also wishes for gender equality for all Vietnamese women.
All the money received from the book copyright, the author will donate 100% to the LOAN Foundation (LOAN Stiftung) to help poor children in Vietnam have a better life.
Thanks to Isabelle Müller for her inspirational story and book!
at Blogtuan.info – Source: Afamily.vn – Read the original article here
