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Become a companion with your child

Communication expert Nguyen Pham Khanh Van said that over 20 years of being a mother, she has never criticized her children but chose to support and accompany her.

Expert Khanh Van holds a Master’s degree in Marketing at ESCP Europe, France. She is an inspiration for women with a personal page of more than 160,000 followers, sharing simple stories about family, young people, how to teach children non-violently… attracting attention from the community. . She has 3 sons all in the Gen Z age (20 years old, 15 years old and 10 years old), the eldest son is currently studying in Canada. With 20 years of experience as a parent, she has many practical shares at the seminar The SACE Journey – Unlocking Gen Z number 3, broadcast on VnExpress on April 5.

In the first part of the talk “What do you teach me”, Khanh Van said that her three children are three different nuances, so being a parent is really interesting because they experience many things. Especially when the three of you are so far apart in age.

“Recently, my eldest son told me ‘in the past, was it appropriate for my mother to teach me this, if it’s not appropriate, don’t apply it to the children’. His sharing made me understand many things, and Realizing that being a parent needs to constantly learn to improve themselves,” the communication expert said.

She also shared her views on the growth of her children. In the eyes of Vietnamese parents, almost none of their children have grown up, even if they are married and have children and grandchildren, so according to her, maturity depends on each parent’s point of view. “When I went abroad to live, I felt disadvantaged as a child because my mother worried about me too much and protected me too much, so when I was born, I was ignorant and didn’t know many things,” she said. Thoughtful.

Before sharing her child, Ms. Khanh Van said that how parents receive that information is very important. Some parents will protest after hearing that, saying that eggs can’t be smarter than ducks and think it’s a rebellion of their children, they don’t see the gratitude of their parents. And she spends a lot of time thinking about it, because seeing that you can talk about it means that you have become more independent, and at the same time have learned from experience with two young children. “It’s also how we learn the trade, so it’s really hard to define adulthood,” she said.





Expert Khanh Van holds a Master's degree in Marketing at ESCP Europe, France

Expert Khanh Van holds a Master’s degree in Marketing at ESCP Europe, France.

After the female experts’ thoughts, the seminar entered the second part with the content “The fall of parenting” – the theme inspired by the title of the book “The Collapse of Parenting” by Dr. Nguyen Chi Hieu. Translate.

The book is about contemporary American society, revolving around the author’s points about how parents in the US are increasingly letting their children loose, giving them too much decision-making power and not daring to establish discipline with their children. As a result of this, according to the evidence from many studies presented by the author, American children and adolescents face a series of problems such as obesity, physical weakness, disrespect for teachers. . Society relies too much on drugs to solve children’s problems.

The author of the book also proposes simple solutions. It means spending time with your child; be really happy to be with your child; make children do housework; teach your children humility, that the world does not revolve around you; don’t be afraid to be too strict; It is much more difficult to create a good character than to give up and conform to the whims of the moment…

From a mother’s perspective, Master Nguyen Pham Khanh Van said that the first two words she thought of when she mentioned “the collapse of parenting” were failure. Parenting is not simply a vocation, but a lifelong mission, “but when it comes to downfall I think of failure, not the failure of the parent alone, but of the child as a whole – the child doesn’t grow up. , unsuccessful, unhappy … so we call it failure, collapse,” she said.

For teenagers who have negative problems, the speaker said that the role of parents is important and should not be blamed on society because this can happen in any society.

“When giving birth to a child, parents are responsible for their children, not the school, the law, or their relatives and neighbors,” emphasized Ms. Khanh Van. “A successful child in my opinion is not earning a lot of money, a brilliant career, and good grades, but a happy child who knows how to live, love, open his heart to everyone, listen to his father’s good intentions. mother, self-confident, critical thinking, creativity”.

She believes that the current attitude of parenting in Vietnamese society, what is happening in the education system in the country, is making children afraid of challenges and afraid of new things. Therefore, it is the parents’ job to accompany and go beyond what the school has done for their children. That is to nurture your personality, not to raise the illusion that you will become the most talented and excellent person. What’s more important is letting them find joy in what they do.

Nguyen Phuong

The series of seminars The SACE Journey – The journey to a top university in the world from grade 10 is within the framework of Education Connect – an educational connection portal organized by the online newspaper VnExpress and the Scotch AGS International School of Monolingualism. Experts will discuss educational topics to assess the challenges of Gen Z parents when accompanying their children, and share orientational views for high school students.
Scotch College Adelaide – an international education system with more than 100 years of development in Australia, is present in Vietnam, starting with the launch of Scotch AGS Monolingual International School from grades 1 to 12, standardizing from the curriculum. Australian National Education (ACARA), received the Australian Baccalaureate – SACE, with international value.
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