Incompetent stupid husband makes his 20-year-old mistress “crazy”
Many women have confided:
My husband loves me so much, there’s never been a problem with him betray.
We have been in love for 12 years before we got married, he absolutely does not “give up on the plate”.
We used to love each other very much but he gradually changed since having children, I feel so insecure.
Most people who have this somewhat subjective optimistic mindset often have problems in their marriage. Is that the mistake?
A fixed mindset is “gradually killing” women in marriage
“If a man really loves me when we get married, he will love me forever and our bond is unbreakable.”
This type of mindset is the “fixed mindset” of many women who are always in love.
In fact, we can ask ourselves: Will the popsicles I enjoyed as a child still taste good when I grow up? Often we will feel this way, because sometimes ice cream is good because it has a taste of childhood, not because it is delicious.
The most certain thing in this life is that nothing is certain, the right people at the time of marriage can become two extremes in the future.
When you use fixed thinking to understand the emotional problems of marriage, you will find that in the face of unexpected events and temptations, your marriage will not be able to stand.
On the surface, it seems to be marital conflict, deception, and betrayal, but the most basic problem is that when the marriage develops to different stages that the husband and wife do not promptly adjust, leading to a marriage crisis. core.
The story of the stupid husband also knows adultery and “emotional development cycle theory”
What is emotional development cycle theory? How does it help us with marital problems?
The emotional development cycle includes: romance, power struggle, integration, commitment, and co-creation.
But the power struggle phase is the most complicated and tumultuous phase that every couple has to go through.
Most troubled marriages end in infidelity and divorce because they are not well controlled in the power struggle.
I will tell you the story of 48-year-old Duong, who has been married for 18 years. She and her husband used to love each other very much, but due to work reasons, they had to be apart for 2 years.
When she discovered that her husband had many suspicious signs, the new follower was shocked because the third person was a girl 20 years younger than her.
Duong herself has always been a wife, mother, and daughter-in-law devoted to her work and family. She also thinks that a stupid man like him is “for money, I don’t dare to betray my wife”.
Therefore, she always believes and expects, just give and you will receive in return. But nearly 50 years old, but her husband is still a wage earner, buzzing. Therefore, Ms. Duong often pulls out her husband to teach her children, that the children should not be like their father, must strive, age and time do not wait for anyone…
Unknowingly, her sarcastic words made her husband more and more distant from her. He did not protest, did not blame his wife, perhaps because he realized that what she said was not wrong.
So he accepted to work away from home for 2 years even though he could completely refuse. The more distance pushed them apart, he was like a bird out of a cage…
During his time away from his wife, he met a young girl who fell in love with him. This made him find his own worth, and his vanity was greatly satisfied.
The sad thing is that after she found out everything, he just bowed his head to admit the mistake. He did not explain without controversy, let her decide an ending for that marriage.
He confided to a friend, for many years, he had worked very hard, bought a house, bought a car, those efforts were not recognized by his wife, but also despised.
When Ms. Duong heard these words, she was shocked, she thought that she had loved her husband the right way. Why is everything that you think is good for your future so heavy?
Although she is not satisfied with him, but putting pressure on him is also to help him grow up, because of this whole family, why don’t you understand?
The most certain thing in this world is that nothing is certain
After receiving her husband’s divorce request, Ms. Duong refused to give in, she used her anger and dissatisfaction to pour out on her husband and his mistress.
At one point of despair she shouted: “I feel that you are not only incompetent but also have moral problems, a bad husband who only loves himself.”
This sentence was like his last suffering, making their relationship even more deadlocked.
He moved to live in his lover’s house, living the life of a thatched hut with 2 golden hearts. No matter how much you hold on, he won’t respond.
The story gives us a lot to think about. Adultery for any reason is never right. However, Ms. Duong tried to control and turn her husband into what she expected.
Her husband also tried, but that effort was according to his needs and perception. He has had enough and he is satisfied with that.
But it is difficult for her to accept, she herself tries to promote each year to set a good example for her children. And then my husband only uses diligence to compensate for his intelligence, dismissing all the expectations of his wife.
Duong like many other women always fixed one way of thinking: “He won’t leave his family for half-hearted desires” but forget that not all men who cheat are afraid of losing their wives.
So they think that just tolerant and forgiving men will return voluntarily. But there is a type of man who has an emotional affair, because he feels that he is too lonely and lost, the percentage of him turning back is very difficult.
That said, every problem that appears, no matter whose fault, both of them need to sit back and see for themselves. Maybe you’re not wrong, I’m not wrong, but because of that relationship, because a family takes a long time to cultivate, we must become right together.
at Blogtuan.info – Source: Afamily.vn – Read the original article here