The scariest thing is that parents FORGET to say this sentence, that’s why their child’s life will bloom or darken later.
When children do something wrong, blaming is not educational. It is a public act that takes away a child’s self-esteem.
There is a story like this: At the water park, while the adults were not paying attention, two little girls who could not swim, slipped and fell from the pool wall into the water at the same time. When lifeguards brought them to shore, both children choked and coughed continuously.
The mother of the first girl rushed over and shouted: “Mom told you not to play around, what if you fell into the water and drowned?”. The little girl heard her mother and immediately burst into tears, sobbing full of anger.
Illustration.
As for the second girl, the mother gently comforted: “Okay, does my little princess dare to go into the water? That’s brave. But remember next time don’t go out and play alone, because you might face danger.”
Then, both mother and daughter laughed. And then, the second girl learned to swim and knew how to swim well. But the first girl did not dare to go into the water anymore, because of the sad experiences she had encountered.
Blaming, blaming is a manifestation of incompetence in education
What child has never fallen while walking?
What child has never choked while swimming?
However, when a child makes a mistake, as a parent, have you seriously considered the first sentence you said to your child? After all, is that likely to affect her personality for the rest of her life?
Many parents, perhaps after their child has made a predictable mistake, say enough negative things:
– Fall again? Be careful entering!
– I’m bored because of you, even such a simple thing can’t be done!
– Why are you always so lazy? Can’t concentrate?
Surely these scoldings are not really what parents want to say. Because any parent does not love and pity their children. But such hurtful words, once uttered, will hurt children. A child can’t fully understand the story, parents don’t have bad intentions when saying negative words.
In fact, that kind of reproach is not an education, but an act of taking away a child’s self-esteem in public.
Many people think that “children don’t think so much”. But for the child, being scolded in public is a blow to self-esteem. The consequence of this is that most children will choose to withdraw, instead of actively facing through mistakes and difficulties. Over time, a child’s negative personality when facing problems will form and develop.
In fact, when a child is blamed and blamed too much, especially from parents – whom the child trusts wholeheartedly, gradually, the child’s views will naturally turn negative. This is extremely scary, because negative thoughts and attitudes will coat a child’s heart with a layer of dust. Children will tend to underestimate themselves, live with low self-esteem, and always look at the world around them in a dark way.
Because of that thought, children are often timid and lose many valuable opportunities in life. For example, a child is often scolded by his parents “Why are you so slow to understand?”or “Adults are talking, what do you understand?” When I went to school, I didn’t dare raise my hand to speak or express my opinion.
On the contrary, if parents can turn the blame into a positive word of comfort, the child will receive a great deal of encouragement. For example, the first girl in the story at the water park.
There is a story like this: The child studied very hard, but due to the wrong posture of holding the pen, his fingers got big blisters, even a little swollen. But the mother did not blame her son for holding the wrong pen, but also praised: “She’s so good. She studies so hard that her hands are blistering. She’ll definitely be a great writer in the future.” Of course, the mother also did not forget to teach her child how to hold a pen.
But the intelligent reaction of the mother made the child more mentally excited, and became more and more interested in learning, became the class president, and also won a high prize in Literature. If at that time, she scolded the child: “Every thing holding a pen should not be soulful”Maybe things would have been different.
In fact, parents’ words have a great influence on children. It can turn your child into a positive or negative child. Therefore, in daily life, when children make mistakes, parents should try to say positive things first. Only then will parents guide their children to correct their mistakes.
Like the famous “half a glass of water” story. When the child accidentally spilled a glass of water, instead of scolding, the mother joked: “Wow, there’s still half a glass of water left”…
Law & readers
at Blogtuan.info – Source: cafebiz.vn – Read the original article here
