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8 things to know if you want to raise your children to be kind people

If children are raised by their parents to be kind people from a young age, they will have a good start and a favorable future. However, the journey raise children knowing how to give, knowing how to help others is not easy at all. One of the best ways for children to understand the value of kindness is for parents to set an example for their children to follow.

In order for children to take practical actions to show their kindness, in addition to parents telling their children “it’s a good thing you need to do”, Dale Atkins – co-author of the book “The Kindness Advantage: Cultivating Compassionate and Connected Children” (The benefits of kindness: Cultivating compassion and connection in children) points out 8 things parents need to pay attention to below.

1. Encourage children to care about others

According to Dale, teaching children about kindness is not explicitly teaching kindness. Instead, parents should encourage children to show their concern for others.

Dale said: “Parents should encourage children to be considerate of others, to listen, to be empathetic and non-judgmental“.

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If a child is polite to a waiter or someone in a store, parents should praise their child. In daily life, parents should also treat their children with kindness and courtesy.

2. Teach children how to behave in public

Parents who want to raise a good child must be the same person themselves. This means that they must know how to show their kindness such as being polite to the cleaning staff, giving money to beggars, helping someone push a cart…

When acts of kindness become a habit, children take it as the norm.

Dale said: “It is important for children to be exposed to good parental behavior in public“.

3. Explain what you do

Parents should explain why they should be nice to others. Children need to understand why and what it means to them.

For example, parents who come home late from work because they helped someone with a broken car should then explain to their children why they did it.

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4. Teach your children to be grateful for life

Parents should often express gratitude for what they have now. For example, being grateful that they have a healthy body, a house, food, health, etc. With such small things, children will realize that they need to appreciate everything they have.

Dale said: “Children should know that gratitude is part of appreciating life. Only when children learn to value their lives will they treat others well“.

5. Do not yell at children in public

When a child acts unruly in public, the first thing parents need to do is keep themselves calm. Yelling at children in public not only makes them feel hurt and embarrassed, but also leaves many other consequences.

If parents can control their emotions, don’t scold and yell at their children in public, it will not only solve everything okay but also show themselves as a psychopath. The most important thing is not to embarrass your children in front of others.

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6. Always show empathy to your children

When children hit others, of course parents will be very angry with this behavior of their children. However, what is necessary for parents to do at this time is to show empathy, not rush to punish their children.

Parents ask children how they feel before and after hitting their friends, why they act like that. Once children feel heard, they will honestly say why they are doing it. Then, depending on the extent, parents need to consider whether to punish the child or not.

7. Read books to your children

Research shows that children aged 4, 5 and 6 years old, if their parents read books about characters whose lives are different from their own, they are often more open and compassionate than other children.

Reading helps children gain empathy and connect with others. After reading, children learn to think, have beliefs, and those things increase empathy.

8. Teaching about kindness requires patience

For a child to have compassion, they need to be nurtured and trained by their parents for a long time. The most core issue is that parents need to be consistent in their words and actions, which will help children realize the good things they should do.

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