10 signs that the first person is lying to you – Young people

You might get avoidance and blame patterns like “If you trusted me a little more, maybe things would get better between us.”

With infidelity, you, the betrayed, are almost always the last to find out. (Illustration)

How do you know that the first person is lying to you? Usually, if you ask this question, you already suspect that you are the victim of infidelity, or at least that something is wrong in your relationship. Of course, the signs of cheating look different in every relationship, but there are some common signs that you can recognize. First and foremost, I’ll tell you this: If your senses tell you that your partner is cheating, that may be true.

That said, you may want to gather other evidence before confronting your partner about their behavior. General signs of infidelity that you may want to look for include:

Upgrade your appearance

If your partner is suddenly starting to exercise and eat healthier, it could be a sign that they’re trying to be more attractive to someone (maybe you, but could be a romantic partner). adultery).

Using your phone or computer secretly

Fraudsters tend to use phones and computers more often than before and protect them as if their lives depended on them. If your partner’s phone and laptop never asked for a password before and now they ask for one, that’s not a good sign. If your partner suddenly starts deleting texts and deleting their browser history on a daily basis, it is also likely that they are hiding from you.

If your partner never leaves their phone free, even bringing it to the bathroom when they shower, that’s not a good sign. If you ask to see your partner’s phone again and they say no, that’s also a problem. Honestly, what could be – aside from the news about your surprise birthday – that they’d like to keep secret?

Unable to contact

If your partner is cheating on you, they will be less likely to answer your calls and respond to your texts. You may hear reasonable-sounding excuses like they’re in a meeting, they’re driving, they’re in coverage area and don’t know that you’re trying to communicate. If you can’t contact your partner while working late or on a business trip, that’s a bad sign.

No longer suitable for sex

Both a decrease and an increase in the level of sexual activity in your relationship can be a sign of infidelity. Have sex less because your partner is focused on others; have more sex because they’re trying to cover it up.

Another possible sign of being cheated on is that your sex life is less emotionally connected. Yet another possible sign is that your partner is introducing new sexual techniques. You might like it but chances are, that skill they learned outside of your relationship.

Your partner has an attitude towards you and your relationship

Liars tend to rationalize their behavior (in their mind). One way they do this is to blame you. They tell themselves, you don’t look the same as you used to, or that you’re just not good enough at sex, or that you don’t appreciate all the great things they do for you, so they deserve it. Have a little fun elsewhere.

Change your schedule, life habits

When your crush – who has never been late for work – suddenly needs to be late for work, and that starts to happen more and more often, they may be lying. If your spouse has never been on a business trip and suddenly feels the need to travel, it could be a sign that they’re spending the weekend with an adulterous partner. Flat tires, low battery, traffic jams, spending a lot of time at the gym, and similar reasons for being late or absent altogether can also signal infidelity. A cheating partner may also suddenly forget to pick up kids, birthdays and other important events, etc.

Your friends seem uncomfortable around you

With infidelity, you, the betrayed, are almost always the last to find out. Scammers’ friends are often aware of the infidelity from the start, and your own friends are likely to find out long before you do. This knowledge often makes these people feel uncomfortable around you.

The scammer’s friends may try to avoid you or be too nice to you. Your friends may try to avoid conversations about your relationship, and they may overcompensate by being kinder.

Unexplained expenses

If there are weird charges on your partner’s credit card or suddenly there is less money in your or your partner’s bank account, retirement account, investment account, etc., it could be is a sign of infidelity. If you ask your partner about these expenses and their answer doesn’t seem to be true, chances are they are.

Infidelity costs money: gifts, travel, wine and dinners, hotel rooms, etc. Fraud costs can add up very quickly. If you see large cash withdrawals or proof of purchases from places you rarely or never often, that’s not a good sign.

If your partner never gives up ownership of their phone (Artwork)

Intimacy has faded

After a few years, no relationship is as passionate as the first few months. That said, we tend to bond and stick together securely over time, learning to trust each other with our secrets, desires, and other important aspects of our lives. our. That process is called building emotional intimacy. And emotional closeness is what keeps us bonded to our loved ones long after the flowers bloom, so to speak.

So, if your partner suddenly seems less emotionally vulnerable and less close to you and doesn’t seem to care about your emotional vulnerability and intimacy, that’s strong sign that they have shifted focus – most likely an adulterous partner.

Playing off the hook when asked about cheating

If your partner is cheating on you, the last thing they want to do is talk about it with you. So when you bring up this topic in conversation, they may try to deflect and avoid it. In short, your partner will do everything they can to steer you to another topic, or they’ll blame what you’re thinking and feeling on you.

You may get avoidance and blame patterns like “If you trusted me a little more, maybe things would get better between us,” you shouldn’t let that weigh on your feeling that something is wrong. something is wrong in your relationship. You also shouldn’t automatically accept your partner’s assertion that you’re at fault. Like I said earlier, if your senses tell you that your partner is cheating on you, you’re probably right.

Please Note: Your lover, spouse can display all 10 of these signs and still not cheat. But these still indicate that something is wrong in their life or your relationship. It may not be cheating, but it’s almost certainly something you and your partner need to discuss. At the same time, your partner may not have any of these 10 signs and still be cheating.

Either way, the good news is that learning of infidelity doesn’t automatically signal the end of your relationship. It simply means that your partner has a lot of work to do if they want to restore trust in the relationship, make things right, and re-establish emotional and sexual intimacy.

If you know that your partner has cheated on you, I strongly recommend that you don’t keep that story to yourself. If you don’t feel comfortable confronting your partner, talk to a trusted friend, your pastor, or a therapist. Don’t sit there alone with your fears and emotions.