Just in elementary school, a boy already knows how to compliment his beautiful friend, write love letters
Ms. Nguyen Phuong L. (37 years old, Hanoi) has a son who is in 5th grade. Once she happened to clean up his son’s books, she suddenly read a handwritten letter he wrote to his classmate. The content of the letter is somewhat immature like a student’s age, but nonetheless shows some early maturity in children’s thinking.
At first, she felt funny about the love of cotton chips, but she felt a little sad when her children did not share with their parents, which proved that the son did not trust her enough. She is a person who lives in modern times, so she is not too strict about falling in love early. Maybe now it’s just love for you, but if you are accompanied and guided by your parents, you won’t lose your way.
Therefore, in order for her child not to think that her parents do not respect her, Ms. L. put the letter back as it was, as if she did not know anything and waited for the right time to talk to her child.
School-age love stories are not uncommon, but parents need to have the right way to handle them. Illustrations
Having also encountered a similar case with Ms. L., but Ms. DPH (Thanh Nhan, Hanoi) was startled, fearing that “If a girl with cracked eyes falls in love, she won’t be able to learn later”.
Daughter of grade 3 already knows how to write love lyrics, Ms. H. was scared but couldn’t help but laugh. I have also heard many stories of girls and boys in kindergarten who liked each other, in class often held hands and played together, I thought “it’s childish, so it’s okay to love each other, but you don’t know how to love each other. “. However, when her 9-year-old daughter just knew how to write and wrote love letters, the story was no longer… childish.
She thought to herself, she’s just a little kid, but she’s already like this, if she’s 2-3 years old, she’ll be “true love, not childish”. She felt insecure, so she bluntly questioned and warned her daughter so that she wouldn’t do it again in the future.
Commenting on this issue on VnExpress, expert Phi Mai Chi of the SexEdu project, love, like many other human emotions, is natural, no emotion is sooner or later.
First of all, it is necessary to clarify the concept of “early love” at school age. From the perspective of adults, students must focus on learning not to fall in love, so the concept of “early love” appears. But according to the process of psycho-physiological development of primary school age, “love” is a very legal thing.
Regarding sexual feelings, children are often attracted to “beauty”. Beautiful concepts of gender are gradually formed at this stage. Children like to make friends with beautiful, well-educated people of the same sex. Concerned about the beauty of the opposite sex through teasing, lending books, utensils… Therefore, many primary school girls like handsome boys who study well and vice versa. At primary school age children learn how to feel beauty, how to call it beautiful, learn how to make friends. This is the correct learning process of the normal physiological process.
At primary school age, children begin to have a clear awareness of their gender roles in society. Children observe and learn from friends and adults around gender stereotypes, how to be a boy and how to be a girl. Boys wear shorts, T-shirts, play catch, cars, puzzles, slouch. Girls wear skirts, like pink, play knitting, dolls, gossip, walk gently. With the immature minds of elementary school children, children tend to learn strong categorizations of masculinity and femininity that distinguish me from others. Children tend to have boys play with boys, girls play with girls.
The misunderstanding and ignorance of parents and teachers about children’s “love way” leads to the risk of children being vulnerable to school bullying related to gender and sexuality. So, in the case of “love” in elementary school, what should and shouldn’t adults do?
– Respect the feelings of the children: Parents should meet privately with a respectful, open, natural attitude so that the child has the opportunity to tell you about the feelings going on in the child, thinking about the friend he or she is feeling. children are interested. Explain to your child about friendships and how to establish relationships that are culturally appropriate where you live.
– Absolutely do not make public comments in crowded places, including online (in the parent group on social networks, in the press, in the media) and offline (in the parent meeting or during class activities). ) by people who are not directly involved, they have no role in handling the situation. These people do not have enough information to properly assess the situation to give advice, even make the story spread out of control, making school boycotts and bullying worse.
In any case, parents should listen to their children and respect them
– Parents and teachers often exchange to understand the problem and current relationship of the children, help children know how to build a suitable relationship. In cases where children face ostracism and teasing from people around, teachers can explain and discuss with parents and students to reduce pressure on children. Distracting the attention of the crowd, helping children cope on their own, and behaving in accordance with the boycott are all things to do.
According to expert Phi Mai Chi, with primary school children who have feelings called “love”, parents should not be too worried but should be happy because most cases are handled quite simply if they start early. Children who have the ability to feel and express emotions are children who tend to learn very well, not bound by stereotypes.
In each case, there is a separate way of behavior and education, if parents feel confused and difficult to handle themselves, they can seek the advice of psychologists, should not let the child fall into a crisis. long-term psychology, there is no way out, affecting the relationship building in the future.
at Blogtuan.info – Source: cafebiz.vn – Read the original article here
