Divorce because your partner is addicted to your phone

Some marriage counselors claim that mobile phone addiction is the cause of 30% of divorces in China, according to the report. SCMP.

“Phone use takes up a lot of time, which is used to communicate with a partner, carry out household tasks or educate children. Spending too much time on the phone has caused many couples to get frustrated. create conflicts,” said Kang Lanying, a marriage mediator in Wuhan (Hubei province, China).

In Wuhan alone, more than 10,000 people mediate family problems. Cao Hongling, another senior mediator based in Wuhan, says 30% of marital conflicts she has resolved are related to excessive phone use.

30% of divorces in China stem from excessive cell phone use. Photo: SCMP.

“Mobile phone addiction has resulted in husband and wife not being able to communicate with each other. If one person spends too much time on the phone, they often don’t share the housework and don’t care about each other. All these things. This problem will eventually lead to divorce,” Cao said.

Cao said this is also a form of violence familycalled “cold violence,” is emotional abuse when one person minimizes or stops all verbal and physical communication with the other person.

Reason for breaking up

China’s divorce rate increased from 2/1,000 (2 divorces per 1,000 people) in 2010 to 3.4/1,000 in 2019. In 2020, it will drop to 3.1/1,000.

The rise in divorce prompted the country’s authorities to introduce a controversial “30 days of reconciliation” policy last year. Under this policy, before being officially separated on paper, couples must go through at least a month of reconsideration.

Cao said she once helped a woman, who filed for divorce because she felt “suffocated” at home.

“My husband doesn’t care about me, the children or the house. As soon as he comes home from work, he just stares at his phone and does nothing else. I asked him to help with the housework, but he didn’t answer. back,” the woman told Cao. “I cannot accept that silence.”

Being glued to your phone instead of communicating with your partner is also a form of domestic abuse. Photo: Shutterstock.

Meanwhile, the husband doesn’t think he did anything wrong because he comes home every day after work. “I just surf social media, read the news and play games on my mobile phone,” the man said.

So he refuses to reduce the time he spends on his cell phone.

Chinese Internet users give opposing views on the information that mobile phones are the leading cause of divorce.

“Couples are no longer in love. Don’t use your phone as an excuse to break up,” one person wrote on Weibo.

However, another commented: “Playing games and watching videos on mobile phones really take up a lot of time. As a result people have no free time or energy to think about other things.”

Phone addiction

Not only in China, excessive phone use is also one of the main causes of breakups in the UK.

57% of 25-34 year olds complain that cell phone use affects their romantic lives, according to a YouGov survey. These people feel that they are always ignored by their lover/partner.

Cell phones also create mistrust, cause arguments and even lead to blame and infidelity.

Amanda Rimmer, family attorney, said: “Some couples now spend more time playing with their phones than showing affection. People sleep, eat, play and talk on their phones.

We’ve seen an increase in divorces over the past 5 years due to phone addiction. Many people also think that the secret behavior of a spouse using a cell phone is a sign that the relationship is falling apart.”

57% of 25-34 year olds in the UK complain that mobile phone use affects their love life. Photo: Handout.

According to the Cambridge Dictionary, “phubbing” is “the act of ignoring the person you’re with by only focusing on your cell phone screen”. This term was born in 2013, is a combination of the words “phone” and “snubbing”.

Signs to know that you are “phubbing”, that is, spending too much time on the phone instead of paying attention to the people around:

– You always carry your phone with you when you are with your lover and friends.

– Most of your conversations with people are short-lived because you often use the phone.

– You are often distracted in conversations because you are busy looking at your phone.

– You fill in the gaps in your conversation by checking your phone.

– While watching TV with others, you continue to use your phone during the commercial period.

According to Zing