Friends post a photo of an activity you weren’t invited to
You’re scrolling through news and suddenly see a photo of your group of friends at an activity you’ve never been invited to. You may feel narcissistic, feeling “left out” but remember that you don’t know the context, it could be a limited list event, or they may assume you won’t care.
Etiquette expert Diane Gottsman says: “Remember that we don’t have to do all the activities. Each group of friends has the right to choose who they want to be with at different events. That doesn’t mean they won’t invite you to the next activity.”
If you still feel left out (perhaps this is the first time your best friends are seeing each other without you), call that best friend for an explanation. According to Gottsman, you need to make sure your tone shows curiosity about the reason, not anger at being left out.
Someone left a negative comment on your post
You wrote down what you thought, but someone responded through the comment with a very harsh tone criticizing you for who you are. According to Farley, before reacting harshly, re-read what you’ve written and opt to delete the post if it might be unintentionally offensive.
The truth is that sometimes it is difficult to express what we think in words and it is possible that what you write has unintentionally misinterpreted the listener and hurt them. If it is clear that the other person is misinterpreting your words, explain and apologize directly for the misunderstanding.
“Continuing the dialogue in cyberspace will not help solve the problem. It will even turn into a war that the whole world can watch,” Farley said.
You are peeking at someone’s information when you accidentally click “like”
You see old photos of someone you haven’t talked to in a while and accidentally hit the “like” button. You startle because you really don’t want others to think you’re stalking them.
However, there is no need to worry because the other person is probably not thinking about it either. Social is for watching, scrolling and watching. That’s why we post everything there. “Everybody on Facebook is peeking at someone,” Gottsman said, “it’s just whether we want to admit it or not.”
Do you feel guilty about ignoring the friend request?
Someone from the same school as you previously sent you a friend request. It’s not a stranger but you haven’t talked to it and aren’t sure if you want the person to see your posts.
Remember that your privacy is up to you, so you don’t have to feel guilty about ignoring the friend request so you don’t have to worry about it later.
“Usually, we are given different suggestions about who we might know. They see you know or have something in common and send a friend request. There’s no need to feel guilty about letting it go because they may not even notice it. If they really want to talk to you or have a need, they’ll pick up the phone and call you,” Gottsman said.
No one replies to the event you created
Last week, you set up a Facebook event for your dinner party, but a week has passed and only 3 people have given definite answers.
“We often encounter this situation when we give invitations where the recipient does not want to say “yes” and is also afraid to say “no”. It sucks when the party planner doesn’t know how many guests he’s going to have,” Farley said.
As suggested by communication experts, you should not be afraid to take the initiative with your friends when you need to calculate the number of participants. It could be posting reminders on the page and reaching out directly to friends you especially want to have a presence in.
An acquaintance who doesn’t stop whining about his personal life
One of your social media friends seems to be going through a very difficult time. You don’t know how to properly show concern. If it is a close friend of yours, give them a call or meet in person to share and encourage them. For others, maybe a line of encouraging comments is enough.
Farley said: “The greatest consolation might be the 80 people who commented on that post. It can be even better than a phone call when the person senses people’s interest in their social media post.”
If that person is constantly complaining or sharing whining posts, you don’t have to worry much. Please ignore it if it’s someone you don’t know. If it’s your close friends, show your interest with a few live chats.
Someone posted a photo that exposes your lies
You had a date that night but ended up lying that your child was sick in order to attend the event with a group of other friends. What you don’t think about is that after the outing, that group of friends is excitedly sharing photos of that fun evening. You know you shouldn’t cancel that appointment, but it’s done and now all you need to do is deal with the consequences.
“You can expect them not to notice and not say anything about the events of that day. They may know it but politely don’t say it, but you really hurt their feelings. Take responsibility for what you’ve done and apologize for it instead of ignoring the photos,” Gottsman said.
Your friend hasn’t replied to a private message yet
You have sent your friend a few lines of messages on social networks a few days ago but still have not received a response. Do not jump to conclusions because the person may not have seen the message.
Your friend may not be a regular person to check social media accounts, or it may be due to the settings that the message is not showing. Gottsman suggests, if you really want to get in touch with them, don’t be afraid to dial their number and give them a call.
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