Most children will gradually enter the rebellious stage from the age of 10-12 years old, this is the time of inevitable psychological transition in the child’s maturation process, at this stage, the sense of independence. and the child’s self-esteem begins to increase, the desire to be individual is different and attract everyone’s attention.
This is also the most difficult time for parents to find educational methods to adjust their children in the right direction. Therefore, parents should pay more attention to their children during this period. So how can parents know that their child has entered the rebellious age?
Children want to be different in front of others
The most obvious characteristic of children at this time is wanting others to feel different and not wanting to be the most ordinary member of the crowd.
So children begin to show their advantage in a variety of ways, even if it’s misguided and humorous.
Children have their own views on many things and do not want to obey their parents’ arrangements
After entering this stage, instead of constantly obeying as before, children will begin to have their own opinions about many things and their perspectives are very unique.
Specifically, children do not want to obey the arrangement of their parents, thinking that it is necessary to break the parental bonds to achieve freedom, so the parents’ words do not seem to have as much effect as before.
Under parental control, children often express their displeasure through talking back
Children at this stage are very concerned about their parents’ discipline, so there are often protests and arguments against their parents.
When a child begins to argue, parents often think that he is insolent and unruly and they are worried about his future. In fact, children disobeying their parents during the rebellious period is an inevitable part of psychological development.
According to Professor Li Meijinn, a lecturer at China Police University, for children who begin to argue and argue, the most important thing they need is the direction of their parents so that their children can understand. How to say it correctly.
Especially the reaction at this time is very sensitive, the following 4 statements of parents will help a lot in the process of adjusting and orienting the right personality for the child.
“You can say what you don’t like, we won’t force you”
Children, regardless of age, really need to be respected, especially when they want to express and assert themselves. Because at this time, children are very emotional, even agitated, and what parents should do is not interrupt and suppress their children, but give them the opportunity to tell the whole story.
Be a good listener to help your child vent his feelings and to have a more holistic view of his story.
Understanding and acknowledging this emotion will greatly ease the anger in your child’s heart, and can also reduce the child’s ability to talk back.
In this way, children can feel that they are treated equally by their parents, without feeling condescending, allowing them to communicate more with their parents, to understand more about their feelings.
“You’re feeling bad aren’t you? Get some rest, we’ll talk when you calm down!”
When children are angry, some bad words may come out, parents help children calm down and teach them that there is nothing wrong with having such feelings, however the way they are acting is not correct.
Pointing out the children’s feelings, helping them direct to a positive way of expressing their emotions, and releasing their frustrations is something that parents need to do. Eg: “I know you’re feeling really bad, get some rest, we’ll talk when you calm down!”
The child who likes to argue actually wants more attention and respect from his parents. Therefore, in some situations, parents should not only focus on setting the rules at their own discretion, but give their children the right to take the initiative, then they will find a way to solve the problem themselves.
When parents give decision-making authority to their children, it will not lose the parent’s authority, on the contrary, this will help children become more obedient and responsible.
“Tell me directly if you’re unhappy, but you can’t talk to your parents like this”.
When children are unhappy, they will directly express their feelings, this emotion is likely to come from hurting others, so parents should tell children not to hide negative emotions in their hearts as they must. rule.
When children understand this truth, they will have better self-control. Even when they are unhappy, children can still really express themselves to their parents and think about others, which will improve their ability to deal with problems and control their emotions.
Children who are in the rebellious period of youth need more comfort and understanding, parents should find a way to get into the child’s heart, not confront the child, this will only increase the distance between the child and the father. mom.
“I’m feeling that you are not listening, if you have any trouble, feel free to tell me”!
Parents are the first people in a child’s life to learn to share and talk, which is an important factor in forming and strengthening the parent-child relationship.
When the child has a rebellious attitude, the mother can tell the child “I’m feeling that you are not listening, if you have any trouble, feel free to tell me”!
This is also the key to forming mutual understanding, respect and trust, which is the foundation for maintaining this relationship throughout life.
Listening is the first step in every conversation, and parents’ attentive listening will help children confidently express their thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
Encourage children to always be ready to speak out problems, stories, express their feelings, thoughts, pay attention to respect, do not interrupt children. Learn to listen attentively and politely, not interrupting your child when he is trying to tell his story.
at Blogtuan.info – Source: Eva.vn – Read the original article here
