“Wife, I’m pregnant”

“Voluntary wedding” of a transgender couple

Sunday morning, Cong Phuong, 36 years old, wakes up at 5 am. After feeding the family’s cows, he rode a motorbike from Tay Ninh to Ben Cat town, Binh Duong to visit his wife.

His wife, Bich Tuyen, also just turned 36, returned to her apartment at 7 a.m. after working 12 hours at a shoe sole factory. With food in hand, while taking advantage of visiting the market to buy fresh, she immediately rushed to the kitchen to cook chicken stew with mushrooms for her husband to nourish because he was nearly 3 months pregnant.

Before that, at the end of April, after hearing that Phuong was pregnant, the couple was supported by the families of both sides to hold a wedding ceremony at a restaurant in Binh Duong. The story “pregnant groom” was spread on social networks, many people have blessed this love story.

Bich Tuyen was born in Cambodia, more than 10 years ago she returned to Vietnam to live. Taking the form of a boy, from a young age, Tuyen clearly showed her female orientation and wanted to live as herself. Therefore, she soon gained the support of her family and “grow up as a real girl”.

“Because I have long hair and wear girls’ clothes, when I went to the district to apply for an identity card, the procedure officer wrote “female gender” for me according to the testimony without a doubt,” Tuyen recalled.

About 6 years ago, Tuyen first injected hormones to have a more feminine appearance. The salary of workers is not very rich, she also takes care of her elderly mother and an orphaned grandchild. Tuyen does not dream of one day having enough money to go abroad for surgery.

At the same time, in Tay Ninh, the girl Yen Phuong, after many years of repression, decided to cut her nipples, inject hormones to shrink her breasts, grow hair on her legs, and live the life of a man.

“I have a younger sister too Transgender become male. Knowing that my mother had prevented me and was very sad, I did not dare to reveal it. Only when my mother passed away did I dare to live for myself”, Yen Phuong said, after that, he changed his name to Cong Phuong and started looking for a girlfriend.

2 years ago, Bich Tuyen posted to an LGBT community group a status line with the content “find a lover”. In front of the avatar of a beautiful girl, Phuong actively texted “dropping”: “You are so beautiful, why don’t you have a lover?”.

In response to the question of the strange “manly” guy, Tuyen was half joking and half serious: “I’m sorry, mommy”? Immediately, Phuong also told the truth: “I’m also petrified!”. Since then, the two have been texting every day, but only see each other as friends, not daring to think far away.

More than two weeks later, on the occasion of Vietnamese Women’s Day, Phuong asked for her home address and rode her motorbike down to Tuyen’s motel room in Ben Cat town. Knocking on the door, her face still covered with dust, Phuong pushed the flower bouquet into the girl’s hand, hesitantly.

No one was brave enough to open up about feelings for the other, but they implicitly understood that they were moved.

Since then, every week, Phuong arranges to ride a motorbike to meet Tuyen once at the weekend. Phuong’s luggage is in the coconut room, in the banana room in the week… the pounding stuff is available in the garden.

The time they met was only a few hours, hanging around the inn chatting and eating delicious dishes Tuyen cooked. On Sunday afternoon, when Tuyen was about to start a shift at the factory, Phuong also drove back to Tay Ninh, starting the week as a hired worker in the banana garden and taking care of the family’s cows. The process of getting to know each other, they do not date in romantic places, do not go on a trip or eat, watch movies together like many other couples.

After nearly 3 months of knowing each other, Phuong asked her girlfriend to come home to meet her family. On that day, his girlfriend had a digestive disorder, so Phuong had to invite the doctor to go home to transfuse sea water. When she recovered, he also bought two beautiful dresses for Tuyen so that she could attend the wedding of his relatives.

“He was mowing grass for the cows in the garden. He would come in from time to time to ask me if I was okay, if I needed help going to the toilet? It was the first time I felt so much love,” Tuyen said.

As for Phuong, during the time of becoming a guy, he used to know many lovers, but only Tuyen gave him a feeling of safety and care.

Since last year’s epidemic, Tuyen stopped injecting hormones, partly because she couldn’t buy medicine, partly because she was also “tired of needles” when she had to “be her own doctor” every week. As for Phuong, until the beginning of this year, he still injects because he wants to become very masculine.

Yen Quyen, Phuong’s younger sister, said: “Phuong once told his family that although he wanted to be a man, when he met Tuyen, he wanted to have children and become a mother.”

At the end of February, Phuong felt “strange” in her body because her period was nearly 2 weeks late. However, the two still thought the reason was due to the side effects of the injection and guessed that they were infected with Covid-19. But restless in her stomach, Phuong bought a pregnancy test. The results showed two bars, he immediately drove to the ultrasound hospital and reported the results to his girlfriend.

“I was happy and emotional, but had to laugh because he said: “Honey, I’m pregnant!”, Tuyen laughed and recalled.

After hearing the good news, the couple’s relatives urged an early wedding. Fortunately, in the process of getting to know and love each other, the families of both sides always support this love story. The groom’s mother also often told and influenced the two to stop injecting drugs to “find a child”.

At noon on April 30, more than 200 guests including relatives and friends of the bride and groom gathered at a restaurant in Ben Cat town to witness the moment the couple returned home.

After the music played, the curtain at the end of the room was pulled open, and everyone’s eyes were on the bride and groom. Phuong holds Tuyen’s hand in a white saree and walks towards the stage.

Having attended many weddings in her life, Tuyen shed tears because she did not think one day she would be the main character. Happier, her wedding was blessed by many unexpected guests, and had to use 2 more spare tables to accommodate.

“Father is mother, mother is father”

Because the two were in a long-distance relationship before, both of them had jobs to make a living, so they hadn’t moved into the same house. After the wedding day, the bride stayed at Phuong’s house for 3 days, then returned to Binh Duong to go to work. In Tay Ninh, Phuong is pregnant, but still works in the banana garden to maintain her income, mowing grass and grazing the family’s cows.

“Sometimes he forgets that he is pregnant, and when he sees cows running, he also chases him,” Tuyen said, with a sense of humor, but his eyes were full of worry.

And Phuong again explained: “Because being a boy for a while, I got used to it, so now I am shy to walk around like a woman. But one thing I remember, is that I don’t drink regular beer like before, I have to keep my baby healthy.”

In recent days, Phuong’s stomach has been “bulging”, each time bending down to pick up things, it is more difficult than before. His breasts also began to swell, larger than when he was on hormones.

Although the first ultrasound at 7 weeks pregnant, the doctor said the baby was fine, but the couple were still afraid that the injection would affect the baby. In particular, Phuong had surgery to cut the nipples, later could not breastfeed but definitely had to use formula milk.

Knowing that the journey of raising children is difficult and expensive, right now, Tuyen is also working overtime, even working overtime on Sundays to save money. The couple cannot register their marriage, they plan to register the birth after the baby is born according to Phuong’s identity papers, considering him as a “single mother”.

“He will probably only work for a few more months and then have to quit and hire someone else to do it because the job at the banana garden is very hard. So now I have to try, children are a strong connection for marriage. In the LGBT community, living by yourself is difficult. Having a lover, getting married and having children is something that not everyone dares to dream of, but it has come true for us,” Tuyen shared, her face dilated. out, patting her husband’s belly, smiling happily.