Witnessing parents arguing, diagnosed with autism at the age of 2
Family life is a journey and challenging experience for all couples. After getting married and having children, many couples said they could not get along due to disagreements on life. The quarrels, scolding appeared dense, unintentionally hurting the opponent and especially children. Often having to witness parents arguing for a long time will make children psychologically affected.
It is also the story of Anh Vy (owner of a chain of Mother and Baby stores) and her son Hoang Ton (nicknamed Beton, born in 2013). When she found out that her son was autistic, Vy cried and was sad a lot, but the next day, the young mother lifted herself up and was determined to overcome the most difficult period with her child. The journey was full of joy and tears, but always full of love.
Sister Vy and her son, baby Beton.
Cover your ears, close your eyes when you see your parents arguing
When Beton was about 2 years old, he had to witness his parents arguing every day. Scared, the child reacts by covering his ears with his hands and closing his eyes so he doesn’t have to hear or see what’s going on. During that time, Beton did not have any interaction even though he played with his mother before. However, at that time, Vy was still not clear about the concept of autistic children.
After that, Beton showed strange signs like growing up but he can’t talk, likes spinning wheels, mom calls but he doesn’t answer, doesn’t interact, takes people’s hands to do something he likes I don’t do it myself and often cry violently and refuse to get dressed. Vy decided to take her child to the doctor, the doctor put her in Beton as a suspected autism because the child was only 2 years old at that time, the signs were not clear.
Vy and her young son.
When her son was 3 years old, Vy decided to divorce and the mother and daughter moved to Saigon. At this time, she took her baby to the doctor and the doctor diagnosed Beton with autism after 30 minutes of testing her child’s behavior in the clinic.
”I don’t believe the information on the internet that says autism will never be normal, autism will not be able to integrate with everyone, autism will have to go to special schools and special skills. There are too many “Fear” that accidentally kill the heart of a certain gullible mother, those things inadvertently turn the outcome of a certain child’s fate to be drawn according to what the information arranges.
Think outside the box – thinking outside the box is your life mindset, you have to create your own ending for yourself and your children. I reduced my work and completely focused on learning about it and in the end I taught my children by myself, without hiring a skilled teacher.
It was very hard at first because my child couldn’t concentrate, but I persevered from 5 minutes to 10 minutes, then to 15 minutes, 25 minutes a day, twice a day with my children playing games with fine activities such as counting sticks, busy board (had to order from the US to send it back with very heavy wood, at that time in our country this toy was not popular), arrange the Infantino tower, drop the fisher price block, some shape-based wooden games available in bookstores, counting color marbles, etc., in addition, it is also necessary to combine with children listening to symphony music to avoid stress, autistic children or self-stress and hurt themselves.
The young mother decided to accompany her child on a long journey.
Autism is not a ‘disease’. This is a very wrong way of thinking of many people. Autism is a type of genetic error, not a virus, so it cannot be called a disease. Genetic errors can occur at any time such as side effects of childhood vaccinations (low incidence), psycho-environmental effects causing stress, difficult DNA repair, and genetic errors as well. causes autism, or the father and mother’s DNA do not match, leading to autistic fetus.
In foreign countries, they can do a pre-marital DNA test of both to determine whether these two genes combine to produce a child with autism to decide whether to have a child or not. And there are so many autism spectrums, no one is like the other, every child is different, so is every child with autism. Children with autism have a high IQ but low EQ or none at all, they will not know what is a joke and what is real, will not know how to comfort, do not know how to coddle, do not know how to talk “tao mai” to dear mother, you don’t punish… but in return, you are very smart and have a great memory”, Vy shared.
Do not believe in fate but decide to overcome autism with your child
If something like this happened to her child, Vy doesn’t blame herself, but also thinks positively that her child is special. Although the first time she heard the doctor said that her child was autistic, the mother of one cried like rain when she read the information online. However, she tried to regain her composure, feeling that she was too cheesy and stupid to believe such things. Therefore, Vy decided to act according to the instincts of a mother: “I will guide myself what to do, miraculously everything appears in front of me that I have to do to take care of the baby properly”.
Instead of the doctor’s advice that she should send her child to a special skill school for autism, Vy hid the fact that she had autism and still enrolled her child in a normal school, only telling her that she was a bit ”special”. ” Thank you for your attention. From childhood to adulthood, Beton was always loved by the girls when he went to school, although he did not know how to talk about love, he often hugged her and buried his head in their stomachs very affectionately.
Beton is a very intelligent, knowledgeable boy.
”Beton is also a boy who is always happy and gets along with his classmates, but the knowledge he says exceeds the understanding of his friends, so he is often isolated. For example, I am very interested in the history of war, space, aircraft parts, these knowledge is difficult to find a “soulmate” at his age. Since childhood, he has shown his extraordinary intelligence. For example, a 3-year-old child, although he did not speak, looked at books for self-referencing knowledge about aircraft and spaceflight components, distances from planets or climatic conditions in those places…”Vy shared about her son.
Do not raise your child with a greedy, pitiful or miserable attitude
Being a father and mother for 5 years alone is not easy: ”I have to ensure finance for my children to attend an international school, improve my life, and set my professional ethics not to rely on my reputation to get rich quickly regardless. Besides, I also have to be beautiful by always loving myself, because in the end, I have to be okay first to have a happy baby..
I see many mothers sacrifice everything for their children but can’t give themselves anything, leading to nurturing their children’s souls through the mother’s miserable attitude, her mother’s suffering, her mother’s misery, making children sad too. and low mood like what my mother went through. I always serve myself happily, so that I can use that happy and satisfied mood to pass on to my child, so he is very active, just like the energy I have given him”.
Lovely moment between mother and daughter.
In order to not stress herself, Ms. Vy still takes some time to go to the spa, wash her hair, do her nails… to refresh herself and then take her children to go out and exercise outdoors, just like that, mother and daughter always have together and have fun together, without pressure or fatigue.
”I advise mothers never to raise their children with an attitude of greed, self-pity, hardship, to love themselves, to be okay first, for their children to be okay. Never lose yourself because of anyone, because that will make you have a sad, tired and irritable life.Ms. Vy sent.
at Blogtuan.info – Source: Afamily.vn – Read the original article here
